And Conservatives Don't Understand What It Takes To "Be A Man"

There are many, many things that can and need to be said about the slow-motion collapsing house of cards that is Chris Christie and his unbelievably corrupt (even by New Jersey standards) administration.  I'll be saying quite a number of them, as the scandals unfold and right-wingers increasingly desert this sinking ship.  For the moment, however, it is enough--more than enough--to reflect on the sheer, unbelievable, unmitigated stupidity of this exchange between Bill O'Reilly and Brit Hume on the subject of Mr. Christie.

It's bad enough that some partisans in the right-wing loony bin have tried to justify Bridgegate as a run-of-the mill example of routine political payback.  It isn't routine, of course, to engage in payback by endangering the public in the process, but we'll let that seemingly obvious point pass for now.  As stupid as the everybody-does-it argument is in this context, it is eclipsed on every level by the apparent consensus between O'Reilly and Hume that Christie's only real problem is that he is too "masculine and muscular ... [t]oo rough around the edges."

This is sexism at its most absolutely stupid.  First, because it denies femininity its own very special brand of toughness (ever given birth to a child, Mr. Reilly and Mr. Hume?).  And second, because it defines masculinity solely in terms of a lack of restraint and/or a lack of respect for the rights and needs of others.  Apparently, today's conservatives don't understand traditional masculinity any more than they understand traditional conservatism.

"Being a man" has never meant doing whatever it takes to get what you want.  It has never meant gratifying every passion in your body.  It has never meant coercing anyone into bending to your will.  And it has never meant putting vulnerable citizens in harm's way.  If anything, it has defined toughness in terms of being able to deal with not always getting what you want, and still living your life in a positive way, cherishing your blessings and confronting your weaknesses.  Take sports, for example.   At every level of competition, we are always taught to play hard but fairly, to celebrate winning and learn from our losses, and to treat our competitors and colleagues with equal respect.  No one has ever accused a male athlete who embraces those principals as somehow "lacking in masculinity."  For that matter, take our movies.  All of our icons of masculinity, from Gary Cooper to John Wayne to Kevin Costner, have been defined as much by what they were not willing to do as much as by what they did, for themselves and others.

Neither O'Reilly nor Hume can tell the difference between being a man and being a thug.  Chris Christie is, without a doubt, the latter, to a degree that might have made even Richard Nixon blush.  His politics and his waistline have one thing in common:  neither of them is defined by any sense of restraint.  And there is only one true lesson to learn from a political career like his:  if your ego is big enough, sooner or later you will trip over it.  That lesson is true for both men and women, and the distinguishing feature of both real men and real women is that they both heed it.